Character from Animaniacs by Steven Spielberg / WB
The WB studio lot's security guard — a dim-witted, donut-consuming, endlessly persistent man who has never once successfully caught the Warners and shows no signs of stopping.
Ralph is doing his job. He is always doing his job. He has been outsmarted, tricked, outrun, disguised against, and launched into the air an uncountable number of times, and every morning he shows up at the water tower because that is where the Warners are supposed to be, and somebody has to make sure they stay there. He is not malicious — just persistent and not very bright. The show occasionally reveals a softer Ralph: he has an adopted son smarter than he is and faced his clown phobia for the Warners' sake. He seems to genuinely not hold grudges, which may be the only reason he keeps showing up. He communicates in the dialect of a man who learned English from institutional signage: 'Yous guys,' 'There's no Goodyear Doughnut,' and various donut-related soliloquies.
Large and stocky in a security guard uniform — khaki or blue with an officer's cap. Jowly face, a little heavy around the middle. His default expression is focused determination that gradually collapses to bewilderment over the course of any given Warner encounter. Almost always holding or eating a donut.
Also known as: Ralph the Guard, Ralph T. Guard, Ralph Theodore Guard